Eli Reed - Tenga Sex Toy
"TENGA is very different. Nothing really compares to TENGA - not just because of how well they 'work' but they're original". We'll take your word for it, Eli.
Dave Wallace - Vibe Gum
When he's not enjoying perfect blues, gaffas, or chilling in the Burge - D Walls can be found chewing on Vibe Gum.
Kelvin Hoefler - Santos FC
Of all the sponsors in this post, being sponsored by your local football team is by far and away the sickest.
Nyjah Huston - Bold's Crackers
How does Nyjah get "in the zone"? By eating Bolds crackers obviously...
Paul Rodriguez - Target
As well as being one of the most technically gifted skateboarders, PRod is also a bit of an entrepreneur and has aligned himself with American discount retailers, Target.
Bert Roeterdink - Bultmans Car Wash
Bert Roeterdink reps his local carwash, Bultmans. As far as practical sponsorships go, this has got to be one of the best.
Andy MacDonald - Amazon
Andy MacDonald is sponsored by online retailing giant Amazon, reality is a strange place indeed. Andy's favourite products on Amazon include a croquet set, one of his own skateboards, and a titanium spork.
Greg Lutzka - Toyota
It probably is selling out a bit, but in all honesty I can't see many of us turning down the offer of a free car.
Lizard King - Celtek Glove
Yes really, Lizard King has a pro glove for a company called Celtek. Though if you skated like Lizard King, you'd probably want to wear gloves.
Tony Hawk - Got Milk?
"Break records. Not bones" Wise words from the Birdman who fronts a campaign to get you drinking the white stuff. Also some joke about milking it.